Leave the Light On

I lost my husband to addiction.

He’s still living (we think) but as a husband and father to my children, addiction to pills took him about a year into our marriage. I didn’t realize how bad til years later and by the end it got so bad he was stealing money from us nightly and when I planned to leave he nearly killed me in front of our 3 boys.

We left.

We are safe.

But he is gone. Long gone into addiction, despite being giving tons of opportunities to recover or at least try.

Sadly during our life together alcohol was my crutch. It was my fuel to survive him.

++ survive I did.

Now that I’m almost 300 days #alcoholfree and over 2 years gone, I see how badly alcohol kept me captive to him and his abusive life.

I was almost killed by this man, on paper and as a human being he is literally a POS yet the more sober days under my belt the more I wish for him to find recovery.

For him to finally feel the happiness + peace the boys and I have.

I don’t want pay back; I don’t want revenge. I want him to finally be free from his addiction. 🙏🏼🖤

If you would have told me when I first left with a broken face these thoughts would be mine, I wouldn’t have believed you. I was still searching for answers; for a reason why. Answers + reasons that will never come.

I hope + pray someone, somewhere leaves the light on + he finds his way.

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